When I first sobered up, my sponsor asked me to do five things every day…
1. PRAY – Get up in the morning, hit my knees and ask God to keep me sober today and hit them again at night and say thank you. Easy, right? Well, new habits are easy to break! It took me a long time to ask God for help on a daily basis, but eventually (years later) I do so many times each day. Today, I not only ask Him to help keep me sober, but I also ask Him for the knowledge for His will for me and that I accept it Gracefully. I understand that what God wants for me is so much better than ANYTHING that I would settle for on my own.
2. Call my Sponsor – Pick up the phone, dial her phone number and say hello. That phone weighed 20 thousand pounds, there was no way I was going to call her. She didn’t need me bugging her every day and I didn’t need help every day; until I did. I relapsed at three months sober and I didn’t even want to! Then I started calling her every day, even if it was only to say, “I don’t want to talk to anyone today.” That woman saved my life so many times and helped me so much. I will always be grateful to her for introducing me to God, as I understand Him today.
3. Go to a Recovery Meeting – Make ninety meetings in ninety days. This was not hard for me, because I loved the happy sober people there, I could relate to them, I was one of them. However, some days it was so overwhelming… after all, learning to be sober was like being asked to be Russian and no one can just be Russian all of the sudden. I didn’t know the language or understand it and learning to be selfless was exhausting! Being sober meant adapting to a whole new way of life and that took time, commitment and amercement in the steps. What ended up happening was that those steps helped me build a relationship with my creator that I wouldn’t trade for anything in this world because today, I know that I do not ever walk alone and that I am so very loved and wanted.
4. Read Recovery Material – How committed was I? Work how many steps? At some of these I balked, couldn’t I find an easier softer way, she thought not! So, as I read the book and worked the steps (the stories, in the back, were my favorite part, at the time), I began to grow and change. The compulsion to drink and use left me. For the first time in my life, my mind was quiet and I understood the meaning of words like serenity, peace, and joy.
5. Help Someone – You mean instead of myself? This was the toughest one for me, as I would soon discover that I had not ever done anything without selfish motives. I didn’t want to waste my time going to that recovery center and listening to those girls go on and on sharing their pasts. I was too busy for that and I had much better things to do! But, I did it, like or not and something began to happened to me every time I went, I began to feel useful for the first time in my life.